Holy 30 pounds!!!!

Holy crap!  I don't even know where to start.  I'm down 30 pounds!!!!

I saw the number I needed on the scale on Sunday morning. I saw 180.8 (I needed 181).  But I didn't quite believe it. I didn't believe it cause I had to get on the scale multiple times to get the same number twice.  I hate that, but I took a photo.  I did my fat monitor.  Just didn't quite want to shout it out.  Then Monday I bumped up a bit and remained the same on Tuesday.  I kind of, sort of, maybe chalked that up to being my time of the month.  I was not feeling well due to cold weather making me sick.  I felt like poop most of Monday and Tuesday so I honestly didn't care what the scale said.  No joke!  Then today I got on . . . I got on 4 times. . . . *all* four times the same weight. . . 

Holy 170's!!!!  WHOOOOOOOP!!!!!!!!   That's a loss of 31.4 lbs since Jan 7th. 

When I started Advocare in January I had hopes for success. I had a plan B.  Have I ever talked about that here?  I was going to do HCG again if Advocare failed.   I had talked to my Dr about it last fall and said I wanted to do it in the new year.  But I decided to give Advocare a try cause I wasn't in the mental state for HCG.  I'm SO glad I did.  I'm beyond glad I did.  This is much healthier and really much easier cause I can EAT!  

I struggle.  I talk about that here.  I probably minimize it a little bit, but the struggle is real.   Yesterday I ate sugar - chocolate covered raisins.  I'm not perfect.  I have weaknesses and bad moments.  But I never ever dreamed that I'd see the 170's in JUNE.  I had hoped to see this weight by the end of the year.  I cannot tell you all how excited I am.  I'm looking forward to the rest of the year and trying to formulate a plan to keep this progress going.  Not necessarily the scale progress, but I need to get off my lazy butt and do some weights.  I need some muscle tone!   I keep saying it and I don't do it.  

I just hope that this isn't a fluke and that scale doesn't skyrocket tomorrow morning. :)   

Advocare random thoughts. . .

Today is day 23. . . tomorrow is the "last" day!  What does last day me?  For me it doesn't mean much.   I have product to continue for 2 more weeks.  I do not want to return to crappy junk food eating.  However I will add some foods in.  I just can't believe 24 days is over already!  That was so fast!

I'm still kind of stuck in my weight loss.  That's ok.  I knew that would happen but I'm really beyond happy to be below 200.  I think that's another reason that I'm continuing.  I'd like to get closer to 190.  The farther from 200 I am, the happier I am.  Like most women I can eat the wrong thing and blow up 3+ lbs in one day.  I know me.  I will stress like mad if that scale jumps up over 200.  

Clean eating is not all that hard.  There is nothing in this plan that makes you count calories.  There is nothing that says you starve.  You eat.  But you eat clean food.  You should see our fridge.  It's stuffed with foods.  There's no room!  We have berries - blueberries, blackberries, strawberries.  We have grapes.  We have cantaloupe.  We have quinoa made up and portioned out.  We have left over cabbage soup.  We have hard boiled eggs.  It goes on . . . .it's crazy!  You have a lot of choices in eating.  You really do. 

I feel more stable in my energy level throughout the day.  I don't have that post lunch crash in energy.  I still have lazy moments but I don't have that sluggish feeling to accompany it.  

I sleep better.  I honestly feel like my sleep is better throughout the night, though it's still hard to get up in the AM.  It's almost like I need more sleep.  Not sure what that is about, but I love the deep sleeps I've been having.  Even when I have trouble falling asleep, once I sleep it's great.  I get up too much to pee thanks to all the water I'm drinking.  And I can tell when I get up that my sleep is better, cause it's harder to get up and I fall back to sleep so much quicker than normal. 

I still have cravings.  I'm not going to lie.  Yesterday I was driving home and I was thinking about how I'd just randomly eat things during the day.  Like maybe I'd stop for gas and buy a bag of chips.  Was I hungry then?  Probably not.  I just like chips and wanted a "snack".  Sometimes I'd buy a chocolate iced cake doughnut with sprinkles from Casey's.  Those are my favorite!!! I'd buy it cause I wanted it.  That's the kind of stuff that is going to have to stop in order for me to be successful and continue to lose more weight.  Maybe that can happen occasionally but it's going to have to happen during maintenance.  And I don't know when that will be or what my weight goal is.  

I'm honestly just really excited.  I feel like I finally lost some weight on my own. For those that don't know, I did 2 rounds of HCG in 2011.   That was tough but it worked.  I was going to do that again this year, but opted to try the challenge before I called my Dr for HCG.   Doing this challenge gave me confidence in myself and my abilities.   I feel like just maybe this is something that I can continue. I hope so!  I'm nervous.  My weight has gone up and down my whole life.   I want to find a happy place and stay.  I think if I can get my husband on board with more healthy eating moving forward that I will succeed. My fingers are crossed!

I'm going to say one more thing - you can do ANYTHING for 24 days.  I realize that food is an addiction like smoking and drinking.  I realize that it's hard to go cold turkey with addictions.  But you can still eat.  You just change what you eat.  Try it!  If you have to count down the days and look for the light at the end of the tunnel that's fine.  You honestly might change that way of thinking as you move forward.  Maybe you don't want to go clean. . . maybe you want to give up soda, candy, chocolate, packaged foods. . . . try it.  I bet you can go 24 days.  But if it makes you feel better commit to 7 days at first.  Small goals.  Attainable goals.  I know you can do it!  Those first 3 days always suck ass for me, but then it gets easier.  I read that it takes 21 days to break habits and make new ones.  Maybe after 7 days, you do 7 more. . . then 7 more.   :)   A few years ago I had this fantastic personal trainer.  He was my "soulmate" trainer.  I loved him!  He moved away and my gym life has never been the same.  But the one thing I carry with me what he would say when I was struggling with an exercise. . . trust yourself.   I carry with me in many aspects of life.  Especially when it comes to health/fitness.  It really got me through my half marathons and the training that went with it.  I repeated it to myself many times during this challenge.  Trust yourself!  I think you will be surprised with what you can do!

2 weeks of the yo-yo

I feel like I'm getting no where.  3 weeks ago I was at 203.0 

Today . . . 

That's where I was last Friday as well.  So basically I'm not getting anywhere.  I'm less than I was 2 weeks ago, when I posted about a gain. But geesh. . .    I think there are a few factors here.  I'm not strict enough on the weekends.  So I go up a couple pounds and fight like hell to get back to a good Friday weight. 

I'm discouraged, but I also feel like in some way my body is starting to tone.  I was at my barn last night wearing lightweight shorts and a t-shirt.   I had a Dr appt and wore the lightest clothing I own.  A lady asked me if I was losing weight.  I said it was an optical illusion cause I'm not in breeches.  She said no I don't think so, weren't you wearing breeches and a pink top last night?  I said yes.  She said 2 people mentioned to her that I was losing weight.  Hmm.  Why can't they tell me?  That's certainly motivating to say the least.  If my fat % monitor was showing a loss I'd believe that I was looking smaller, but it's not.  However, I think I'll keep on the same path and see where I go.   Maybe with a bit less back to back days of running. . . . 

Last night I had a Dr appt.  I see a naturopath Dr for my thyroid but she has become my primary Dr.  We talked about my afternoon fatigue and possible adrenal support.   Stress really messes up the adrenal glands and they help the thyroid.   So she put me on ashwagandha - a herb - twice a day for adrenal support.   We briefly talked about running and I mentioned that I don't lose weight and that I seem to slowly gain.  She said too much stress on the body and the adrenals are releasing cortisol.   So this herb will help out.   Well. . . I find that I get myself in this rut of having to run run run every day.  At lunch this week I ran M-W.  I forced myself not to run yesterday and quite frankly it was hard.  Of course it was about the best weather day of the week so that didn't help.   But I think running 7-10 days in a row, even when many of the weekday runs are just 2 miles, might not be the best thing.  So I need to shake it up some more.  It's just *so* easy to run at lunch and then not have to deal with it the rest of the day.  So I'm going to ponder this some more and think about what to do.  I still want to do a fall half marathon so maybe now is the time to relax my running to just 3-4 days a week.   However, today is one of those days.  I love my Friday runs.  I run 3 miles and then I pick up a Imo's salad lunch special.  It's my one "bad" lunch that I get during the week at work.  Since I run right before I don't feel so bad.  As the best time to eat would be right after a run. 

I should also mention that I asked my doc about doing a round of HCG in the fall.  It would have to be after my marathon and that's getting really close to the holidays.  So I'm not too sure. But if I can't get below 200 and stay there on my own I might do another round.  I have to get myself in the mental state though and that's tough.  I would like to have birthday cake on my birthday and that would likely not happen due to the timing of this round based on when I want to do a marathon.  But it would be worth it I think? 

On the 4th of July I was off and while I did photograph the scale I didn't post.   We went to a Cardinals game that evening.  (one of the reason my weight goes up - dang ballpark food and drinks)

Here is a selfie and a view from our seats in one photo.  I need to make use of dual camera mode more often.  Though my eyes are practically closed here. 

Following the game there was a fireworks show.  It was just so awesome.  Everyone stayed in their seats and there was anticipation in the air.  Almost like an encore at a concert.   The show was really well done and the fireworks were released all the way around the stadium so every seat had a great view.  These were the only fireworks we saw this year and they were fantastic. Unfortunately I suck at photographing them so many of my photos don't do them justice.  They are tricky to photograph. 

Have a great weekend! :) 

Hello?

Hello!  I've noticed an increase is the views of my blog.  I figure I have very few followers and only one person that I actually "know" follows my blog.  So if you stop by here and read this, please leave me a comment and say hi!  I'd like to meet you and if you have a blog I'd love to check it out. :)

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As a recap for anyone that is new, or may really not know, I have hypothyroidism.  It sucks.  I don't blame my weight issue (now) on my thyroid, but it sure doesn't help.  I believe I was diagnosed in college.  I remember being so tired.  I didn't think too much of it till one day I was at Wal-Mart and I was *so* tired.  I had a few items in my hands and I set them down and left.  I just drove back to my apartment and . . . I don't remember. lol   That feeling of being soooo sooooo tired is stuck in my brain.  It sucked.  I did gain weight before I was diagnosed.  I went to the Dr I'd been going to since I was too old to see my pediatrician.   He put me on synthroid and I've been dealing with this ever since.   Several years ago however, it seems that synthroid wasn't quite working so well anymore.  I gained weight no matter what I did.   I reached my heaviest weight ever - 250 lbs. I started researching.  I joined Spark People and got in the Thyroid group.   I read the book "Stop the Thyroid Madness".  I was unhappy with how I was feeling.  I went to my Dr armed with all this information and he basically laughed in my face.  He told me he knew better than I did.  I cried.  I was fat. I was depressed.  It was affecting all parts of my life.  He did bloodwork and I suppose he increased my meds. I don't really remember.  I kept on researching and found a Dr in Missouri (probably an hour from my house).  She is a naturopathic Dr (practicing under a regular medical Dr as the state of MO requires).  She is fantastic and pays attention to symptoms and not just numbers.  She also test all aspects of the thyroid (such as T3, reverse T3) instead of simply the TSH.  After trying a few things, I ended up liking Erfa Thyroid from Canada.  I have to pay for it completely myself but I love it.  I feel the best on it and it works for me.   I still struggle to lose weight, but I'm not 250 anymore!   I worry that at some point things will go whacky again, but I see her regularly for bloodwork and I think that if it does start to go crazy she will be able to get me back on track again quickly.

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As I said I do struggle to lose weight and I had the most success by doing HCG.  *gasp* It's ok.  You can freak out.  I know the diet has a bad reputation but it worked for me.  I've maintained probably just over half the weight loss (having hips surgery and being laid up didn't help with maintenance) for 2 years.  I kind of want to do it again to get over this hurdle.  It really changed the shape of my body. I suspect if I finally lose the 20 lbs I'm battling that I may not fit into my favorite jeans anyways.  Why?  Cause I think the weight will be distributed differently.  HCG really targeted the abnormal fat stores (for me it was my hips).  If anyone has any HCG questions feel free to ask.   I don't think I have the mindset or willpower to go on it any time soon.  I start training for my half marathon next week.  There's no way I can do that being on HCG.  And when the half is done (mid-April) summer will be here and I will be going to ballgames and not want to be restricted.  I'm just hoping that maybe I can buckle down during my 12 weeks of training and get some of this weight off.

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Speaking of weight, I ate what you saw in that food log I posted yesterday.  For dinner I had 2 scrambled eggs with a piece of melted cheese and 3 links of banquet fully cooked turkey sausage.   I make my eggs in a pan sprayed with Pam.  No butter or oil.   I did have fiber one granola bar and package of fiber one fruit snacks after dinner.  

I filled out the rest of the food log and it won't all fit on my screen, but here's the bottom half. . . ignore the "goals".  I don't know where those came from and haven't figured out how to change them yet.  I did Chalean  Burn 2 last night before dinner.  And I will say the scale rewarded me this morning, so that's a good thing.  Fingers crossed that I can continue this cause I'm sore as heck and hoping to make some progress.  I want to be in Onderland at the very least. 

Nom Nom Nom

Let me start by saying I hate really dislike the term "nom nom nom".   It's popular though.  Today I'm going to talk about food, so I guess it's appropriate.

I decided to go to my fitness pal and track my "normal" work day eating.  Might as well lay it out there and see my calories.

I've never been a proponent of the 1200 cal diet for women.  I think that's really low and I'm not sure who really eats like that.  Maybe people do and I'm just clueless.  When I was on the stabilizing phase of HCG I was eating around 1800 cals a day and maintaining my weight.

Generally speaking, M-F I eat the the same breakfast.  It's a smoothie made of 1 1/2 cups almond milk, 1 banana, 1 scoop Shakeology and ice.  I think this is a appropriate breakfast though my Dr would tell me to eat half a banana because of the sugar.  Who eats half a banana?  Not me.  Once that baby is peeled it's fair game. On the weekend I have the smoothie or eggs (I am a proponent of high protein) and turkey sausage.

M-F lunch is a salad made up of romaine lettuce, 6 oz grilled chicken (again high protein hence the 6 oz), some onions and peppers.  My dressing is salsa.  Why spend calories on Ranch?   Even though I would like to.  IF I go out to eat it's usually to Imo's where I get a chef salad and house dressing (so this would be higher in cals of course) or to a BBQ place where I get a salad that is just lettuce, onion and smoked chicken.   I use BBQ sauce and a little bit of Ranch as the dressing then.  At both places I may eat bread.  I try to avoid carbs, but I think that in general a body needs some carbs even if it is from bread.   Weekends are kind of different.  If I eat the smoothie for breakfast I often have eggs for lunch.  During the week I have a serving of Planter's nutrition energy mix to satisfy my "sweet" craving.

Dinner M-F is usually a meat (around 6 oz) and a vegetable (green beans or creamed corn usually).   We've pretty much cut out carbs for dinner.

So this all sounds pretty healthy right?  Well when I lay out the numbers (minus dinner) it looks like this:

I'm not sure what my thoughts are on this.  Clearly my daily routine is pushing 1200 cals leaving not much room for dinner.  But where do I cut?   What do I remove?   I want to be close to or over 100 grams of protein.   The carbs could be reduced but they are mainly from fruit.  Ahh!  I feel like this is just some kind of evil math.  I don't know what works for my body.  But I'm really frustrated. I don't understand my body.  For example I gained weight this morning.  Dinner last night was 6 oz of grilled chicken with BBQ sauce and butternut squash risotto from Trader Joe's. As I said we normally don't have carbs at dinner but I saw that at TJ's and wanted to try it.  Could that have blown me up?  Probably.   Why is this so hard?  Am I destined to be fat forever?  Probably.  In reality I would say yes.  But why?  What am I doing wrong?

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So we should talk about working out.  My half marathon training starts next week.  I'm trying to incorporate the lifting workouts from Chalean Extreme to build muscle.  Hopefully making my running more efficient.  I started really working out again on Sat Jan 11th.  Taking in account that I'm only lightly running till the training starts.  Here's what I did:

                            Jan 11: Chalean Burn 1
                            Jan 12: 2 mile run
                            Jan 13: Chalean Burn 2
                            Jan 14: 2 mile run on treadmill
                            Jan 15: Chalean Burn 3
                            Jan 16: Rest (I had a massage!)
                            Jan 17: 2 mile run on treadmill and 2.5 miles on bike
                            Jan 18: Chalean Burn 1
                            Jan 19: 2 mile run
                            Jan 20: 2 mile run and Chalean Burn 3 (should have been burn 2 but oh well!)
                            Jan 21: Chalean Burn Intervals (this is a 45 min workout alternating cardio and high reps                                           of light weight - it's pretty challenging)

So. . . I think that's pretty damn good.  I mean this is dedication right?  And my weight?  I keep going up and down the same pound.  And I'm pretty damn sick of it!  

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I don't want to do HCG again, but I'm seriously pondering it.  It seems to be the only thing that has ever really worked for me.   It's hard as hell but the rewards might be worth it.  I really can't decide.  But I'm tired of living like this.  I really think about what I can eat all the time.  I hate it.   And when I do eat something I shouldn't, I immediately think about what workout I can do. I'm a "cardio punisher".   By that I mean I use cardio as payback for eating something I shouldn't (like cookies yesterday).   Do I need to go full paleo?   Do I need to try Atkins?   What exactly?   Cause I'm tired of working this hard to just maintain my weight.  And I'm damn tired of hovering just above 200 lbs.  I promised myself that I wouldn't get above 200 lbs again.   And yet here I am. . . and I want to wear that ring I bought myself for reaching Onederland.  But I promised myself I could only wear it if I was in Onderland.  So it sits in my jewelry box.  :(  And I continue to stress about this every day.