Wednesday, January 22, 2014

Nom Nom Nom

Let me start by saying I hate really dislike the term "nom nom nom".   It's popular though.  Today I'm going to talk about food, so I guess it's appropriate.

I decided to go to my fitness pal and track my "normal" work day eating.  Might as well lay it out there and see my calories.

I've never been a proponent of the 1200 cal diet for women.  I think that's really low and I'm not sure who really eats like that.  Maybe people do and I'm just clueless.  When I was on the stabilizing phase of HCG I was eating around 1800 cals a day and maintaining my weight.

Generally speaking, M-F I eat the the same breakfast.  It's a smoothie made of 1 1/2 cups almond milk, 1 banana, 1 scoop Shakeology and ice.  I think this is a appropriate breakfast though my Dr would tell me to eat half a banana because of the sugar.  Who eats half a banana?  Not me.  Once that baby is peeled it's fair game. On the weekend I have the smoothie or eggs (I am a proponent of high protein) and turkey sausage.

M-F lunch is a salad made up of romaine lettuce, 6 oz grilled chicken (again high protein hence the 6 oz), some onions and peppers.  My dressing is salsa.  Why spend calories on Ranch?   Even though I would like to.  IF I go out to eat it's usually to Imo's where I get a chef salad and house dressing (so this would be higher in cals of course) or to a BBQ place where I get a salad that is just lettuce, onion and smoked chicken.   I use BBQ sauce and a little bit of Ranch as the dressing then.  At both places I may eat bread.  I try to avoid carbs, but I think that in general a body needs some carbs even if it is from bread.   Weekends are kind of different.  If I eat the smoothie for breakfast I often have eggs for lunch.  During the week I have a serving of Planter's nutrition energy mix to satisfy my "sweet" craving.

Dinner M-F is usually a meat (around 6 oz) and a vegetable (green beans or creamed corn usually).   We've pretty much cut out carbs for dinner.

So this all sounds pretty healthy right?  Well when I lay out the numbers (minus dinner) it looks like this:

I'm not sure what my thoughts are on this.  Clearly my daily routine is pushing 1200 cals leaving not much room for dinner.  But where do I cut?   What do I remove?   I want to be close to or over 100 grams of protein.   The carbs could be reduced but they are mainly from fruit.  Ahh!  I feel like this is just some kind of evil math.  I don't know what works for my body.  But I'm really frustrated. I don't understand my body.  For example I gained weight this morning.  Dinner last night was 6 oz of grilled chicken with BBQ sauce and butternut squash risotto from Trader Joe's. As I said we normally don't have carbs at dinner but I saw that at TJ's and wanted to try it.  Could that have blown me up?  Probably.   Why is this so hard?  Am I destined to be fat forever?  Probably.  In reality I would say yes.  But why?  What am I doing wrong?

So we should talk about working out.  My half marathon training starts next week.  I'm trying to incorporate the lifting workouts from Chalean Extreme to build muscle.  Hopefully making my running more efficient.  I started really working out again on Sat Jan 11th.  Taking in account that I'm only lightly running till the training starts.  Here's what I did:

                            Jan 11: Chalean Burn 1
                            Jan 12: 2 mile run
                            Jan 13: Chalean Burn 2
                            Jan 14: 2 mile run on treadmill
                            Jan 15: Chalean Burn 3
                            Jan 16: Rest (I had a massage!)
                            Jan 17: 2 mile run on treadmill and 2.5 miles on bike
                            Jan 18: Chalean Burn 1
                            Jan 19: 2 mile run
                            Jan 20: 2 mile run and Chalean Burn 3 (should have been burn 2 but oh well!)
                            Jan 21: Chalean Burn Intervals (this is a 45 min workout alternating cardio and high reps                                           of light weight - it's pretty challenging)

So. . . I think that's pretty damn good.  I mean this is dedication right?  And my weight?  I keep going up and down the same pound.  And I'm pretty damn sick of it!  

I don't want to do HCG again, but I'm seriously pondering it.  It seems to be the only thing that has ever really worked for me.   It's hard as hell but the rewards might be worth it.  I really can't decide.  But I'm tired of living like this.  I really think about what I can eat all the time.  I hate it.   And when I do eat something I shouldn't, I immediately think about what workout I can do. I'm a "cardio punisher".   By that I mean I use cardio as payback for eating something I shouldn't (like cookies yesterday).   Do I need to go full paleo?   Do I need to try Atkins?   What exactly?   Cause I'm tired of working this hard to just maintain my weight.  And I'm damn tired of hovering just above 200 lbs.  I promised myself that I wouldn't get above 200 lbs again.   And yet here I am. . . and I want to wear that ring I bought myself for reaching Onederland.  But I promised myself I could only wear it if I was in Onderland.  So it sits in my jewelry box.  :(  And I continue to stress about this every day. 

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