Confession: I'm a scale junkie

OMG!  I get on the scale every freaking day.  How horrible!  Judge me now.  

I understand that this doesn't work for everyone.  If we were all the same what a boring world this would be.  

I get the unhealthy aspects of this.  But gosh darn it to heck. . . I'm tired of the harping about *not* getting on the scale every day.  You gotta do what works for you.  I'm on the scale every single flipping morning.  It's what I do.  Do I freak out if I gain weight?  No.  Do I happy dance if I lose?  Yes!  I can eat Chinese food and gain 3 lbs the next day.  I know this.  I'm aware of it.  I move on.  My time of the month can cause a 2 lb gain the first day of that week.  I know this.  I hate it.  Lol! 

I found this article this morning. Holy cow!  Stop the presses!  This actually says it's A-OKAY to get on the scale every day.  Take that you once-a-week-scale-judging peeps!  

"Stepping on the scales should be like brushing your teeth," says David Levitsky, a professor of nutrition and psychology at Cornell University.

Hallelujah!!!!!  That's me - first thing after I pee.  On the scale I go.  

The article also says: "It was possible that cause and effect went the other way —  that good numbers kept people coming back to their scales while disappointing numbers kept them away."

Interesting eh? 

Now keep in mind that the scale doesn't define you. 

And if you let it define you then maybe you do need to break up.  Maybe you should seek therapy.  

But I think there is a healthy way to get on the scale every day.  People say "measure - go by how your clothes fit".  I'm here to tell you that I'm 5'10".  I'm lucky that I carry my weight pretty well.  I've weighed 250 lbs and people were stunned when they heard that.  I thought I looked like 300 lbs.  But whatever.   They didn't see it.  So I can gain 20 lbs and guess what?  My jeans still fit!!!  So I like to stop that crap in it's tracks - before my friendly scale says I gained 20 lbs. 

So my scale is my friend.  We have a morning meeting every morning.  It's ok.  I go on with my day.  You gotta find what works for you.  If you have a once a week relationship then that's great.  I won't judge your relationship, please don't judge mine.  

Friday weigh in and the cell phone drama

Well I guess I was consistent this week and maybe the Friday weigh in isn't really helping.  I don't know I just can't seem to buckle down and be clean all the time.  I really want to hang around 181 for a while.  I just gotta buckle down and do it I guess.  But at least I pretty much just stayed the same this week.

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I have been running and following Hal Higdon's training plan for the 15K.  This was a step back week so not too much to report.  So far I've done two 3-mile runs on the treadmill.  I have a 4 mile run this weekend.  Last night's run on the treadmill was one of my best feeling runs since I started running after my illness.  I'd really like  to get my fitness level back and be able to run consistently without any walk breaks.

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There's been some cell phone drama going on.  I have three lines on my Sprint account: me, my husband and my mom.  And we were due for upgrades.  And we could still get a subsidized phone on Sprint and get another 2 year contract.  All phone providers are going to the lease a phone, no contract options.  So we upgraded last Friday and got three Samsung Galaxy S6 phones.  And we hate the battery life.  I adore the freaking phone but despise the battery life.  And so that makes me worry what it will be like in 6 months. . . 12 months. .  the whole second year of owning it?  So we are pondering switching to Verizon just for the Motorola Droid Turbo 2.  It is shatterproof which is amazing.  But I've only own Samsung smartphones.  And I've only ever been with Sprint. So there's some anxiety in switching and I don't know which way I want to go. This is causing arguments with my husband and I.  And tears of stress with me.  Just over a phone.  Honestly though for me, the issue is really that my life is pretty stressful and sucky that the little things are stressing me out more.  What to do?  I have unlimited data on Sprint.  Should I really switch and pay more/same for LIMITED data?!  AH!!!  Any advice is welcome. :) 

Finally some progress!

So I buckled down as best as I could last week and told myself that I would not mess up this weekend.  And finally there's progress on the scale!  That being said I should say that I got a 24 hour stomach bug on Saturday night and threw up once.  That definitely helped the scale.  The next morning I was down 2 lbs.  Then yesterday (Sunday) I ate a lot of crap.  All I wanted for lunch was waffle fries from Arby's.  Don't ask me why, but I got them and a Jr roast beef sandwich.  Yum!   I had ice cream for dinner.  The scale went up but not too much.

That's a loss of 4.6 lbs.  I would bet a bit is artificial.  We'll see what happens this week.  I'll take it for now and hope to carry it forward.  My fat % went up which I thought was interesting.  So many things affect that fat monitor though including dehydration and I suspect I am a bit dehydrated.

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I got to ride Eli on Saturday before I got sick.  I put his Back On Track blanket on for 30+ mins before riding.  I've never been able to implement this well enough to know if it's helpful.  He's not making much improvement and I'm tired of sending the vet more videos.  He just requested more last night.  I'd rather just take him back for the bone scan.  That would be the next step.  It's hard to keep making videos of me riding.  I need another person.  And it's been a month since we had the neck injections and there isn't really any progress to be had.  So I'm ready for the next step.

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I won these mums from a local orchard on FB last week.  Who knew someone actually won those things? :)  I haven't bought any mums so this was great!

Encouragement needed

I've gained a solid 10 lbs since I got sick.  I was around 178 when I got sick.  I'm now 188.0. 

I really wanted to kick, scream, cry. . . throw a two year old temper tantrum this morning.  But this is *my* fault.  I own it.  I've been eating like crap.  I've been drinking soda.  I'll do go for a day at most and then it's back to crap eating. 

I don't often use this fat monitor, as you can tell by how dirty the screen is.   I was running late for work (as always) so I didn't feel like making it pretty for a picture.  But I'm up about 2% I think.  Again I don't use this thing that often, so hard to know what my lowest was.  But I don't think I ever got below 30%. 

And this is why I'm gaining weight. . . I'm doing things like this.  This is a Gus' Pretzel. . . it's a St Louis thing - they've been around since 1920.  And that's a Shock Top in my hand.  And yes it's a playoff game.  And yes, it's the Cardinals and the Cubs.  It's historic.  But whatever.  I can't keep eating like this.  So I've got to buckle down.  I have another playoff game Thursday (if we make it that far).   My goals are to be pretty damn perfect between now and then. 

I welcome all advice for how to get back on the wagon.  I know people struggle with this.  I know that this isn't rare.  What do you do to get back on track?  Cause I gotta stop the scale before it hits 190.  I've worked hard for this!   I can't let it slip away. 

To step off on the right foot, this is breakfast:

Progress on the cleanse

Today is day 6 of the Advocare Herbal Cleanse.  Yesterday I hit my lowest weight of the year.  Heck of last year too. 

I totally did a happy dance on the scale.  6.2 lbs lost since I started the cleanse.  Today I weighed 185.2, 185.6 and 185.8 . . . three times on the scale.  I gave up and called it a wash.  Tomorrow hopefully I'm in the 184's. 

I'm wearing my favorite Silver jeans.  I wore them at Rolex as that was a huge goal of mine. I  wore them there in 2012 and not again since cause I couldn't fit.  I kind of still can't fit as they are lower waisted and give me a slight muffin top, but they look rocking everywhere else so I deal.  I wear a thin jacket all day at work anyways. :)

On FB someone asked me how hungry people are when they do the cleanse.  The point is to eat and eat clean and healthy.  Not starve.  This was my breakfast on Saturday morning:

2 eggs, turkey sausage and quinoa.  M-F at work I eat 2 scrambled eggs and quinoa.  I prep the eggs on Sunday and reheat them at work when I eat breakfast. 

Here is a lunch from this weekend.  I just threw it together cause it sounded good: 

That's quinoa, a can of turkey and a hard boiled egg.  Can you tell I love quinoa.  We make it in chicken broth instead of water.  It adds a little taste to it.  This lunch was smaller than I'd normally eat probably.  I eat a ginormous salad every day at work.  But I was busy this weekend and didn't have a lot of time and I wasn't all that hungry.  

I'm really loving the cleanse again. I liked it the first time. Cravings for sweets are minimal.  If I see it I want it, but I don't think much about it.  Last night I put some Albanese chocolate and gummies (the best gummies in the world) into containers for air tight keeping.  My friend lives near Albanese and brings me an order to Rolex every year.  It was hard to play with all the chocolate I had and not shove some in my mouth.  But again I was handling it.  It was in my face.  Out of sight and I don't think much of it.  

Today there is birthday cake at work.  I'm ignoring it.  I sit downstairs.  It's upstairs.  I won't go upstairs unless I absolutely have to.  And hopefully by the time I would need to the cake will be gone :)

I see my blogs appear to be getting read by a few people consistently.  At least I assume it's the same people.  But I haven't had comments for a while.  If you are reading and you have any questions, please ask!  I'm truly in love with my new lifestyle!  I have to go see my thyroid doc soon.  I'm trying to wait till I see the 170's before I make the appt.  I kind of want to shock her with my weight loss! :)  Though I think she'd be impressed with where I am now.  Her scale will weigh me heavier - afternoon, fully clothed, etc - so I'd like to lose 10 more lbs if I can.  175 is a huge goal for me and my body might resist it for a bit.  But I'm on this journey to stay.  I don't see any detours. 

25 pounds . . . and my "roll"

Whoop! Whoop!!!!!!!

25.6 lbs down!  *Finally*   186 was the 25 lb mark and I was 186.4 the day I left for Europe.  Gosh it took me a bit to finally see this.  And what else do you see???   Finally a "normal" BMI.  The last time I used the fat monitor my BMI was over 27 and it was "high".  Woo hoo!!!!  

Yesterday I woke up wither either allergies or a head cold.  How do you tell?  I never though I had allergies until these past several years.  Blah!  My throat was scratchy, my eye itched, my nose was a leaky faucet.  . . that all probably helped me see this number on the scale.  I just didn't feel much like eating, but I did run 3 miles, ride Eli and do errands.  So I was active. I ate a crap ton of fruit cause when I have a sore throat I like food to go down and scratch/rub it.  :)  Strange I know.

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Saturday we went to out first Cardinals game of the year.  I got a new shirt before I left for Europe and I gotta tell you I felt like I looked good and bad at the same time. The shirt didn't hide much cause it was fitted and white.   I had my hubby take a photo. 

*ALL* I see in this photo is my dreaded fat roll.  Ugh.  I told my hubby to let me know when it's showing.  I can hide it.  I can stand in ways that hide it.  I just don't always know when it's making an appearance.  I had him take one from the waist up cause I was afraid it was showing.  That's the one I posted to FB. :)   I swear. . . .   back in the day I had this friend who has quite the belly pooch.  We would shop a lot together.  She was jealous of the fact that I didn't seem to have a pooch.  I would say that isn't true and never was.  But my stomach has always been less poochy than hers.  However she doesn't have a muffin top roll.  She once said she wouldn't give up her pooch if it meant having a roll.  Cause she sees how hard it is to hide.  However, even though I hate it, I'm pleased with my progress and how I look :) 

I'm really trying hard not to push Advocare on my FB.  I get sick and tired of friends that only post about shit they sell.  But it's hard cause I'm so excited about it.  I just never dreamed I'd reach 25 lbs this early in the year.  Really I thought it'd be fall before I saw the 180's.  This is exciting.  I feel good, have more energy, have clearer skin. . . .and I get excited talking about it.  I want to help everyone! :)  But I know I have to wait and let them tell me when they are ready. 

Down down baby . . .

Tell me that title doesn't make you wanna sing Country Grammar? 

I'm going down down baby, yo street in a Range Rover. . . . 
Boom boom baby, ready to let it go. 
Shimmy shimmy cocoa what? Listen to it pound. . . 

Ok maybe it's not the same thing as the scale going down, but when I got on the scale yesterday I started singing this song.  No joke. 

This morning the scale was exactly the same.  Whoop!

So I'm not making much progress on the fat percent.  I think when I return from Europe I may have to start some weight training.  Just more stuff to add to my to do list! 

That brings my total loss to 23.2 since Jan 7th when I started Advocare.  Of course most of the lost was during the 24 day challenge and the rest of the first month.  I'm pretty happy with this.  I was hoping to see 185 before I left for London, but that's not very likely.  I'm ok with that.  

My lowest adult weight (when I did HCG in 2011) was about 173-ish.  I didn't even remember that and went back to look.  178 really stuck out in my head and I think that I maintained at that range for a bit.  So that was really on my goal list this year.  To see 178 again.  I'm slowly getting there.  My highest adult weight (I think 2010-ish when my thryoid went whacky even though I had been on meds forever) was 250.   It's fun to think about how far I am from that again.  It's definitely motivation!

Another thing that motivates me are NSV's.  Like the fact that when I'm wearing most jeans I'm comfortably on my last belt hole.  I do have a pair of jeans that sit more below my waist and those babies put my belt on the second to last hole.   Also seeing my reflection in door/windows is very motivating.  I'm finally really seeing a difference in my hips in the reflection.  Makes me happy!

So I leave for London a week from tomorrow.  My to do list is a mile long and I'm a bit stressed.  Work is still super busy and that makes me exhausted when I get home at night. 

Oh one more thing - I finally read Gone Girl.  . . . can I get my time back?  what I could have done with the time it took me to read that in the evenings.  Ugh.  Great story line until the disappointing ending that ruined it all.  What a way to fizzle out. I wanted to see the movie and I chose to read the book first.  I will not be seeing the movie.  Lame. 

Some Victories

So I'm a number person.  I hate that weight fluctuates so much.  In  my last post I said I lost 20 lbs.  Then for the next 5 days my weight bounced up and down a tiny bit and never went back to that 20 pound mark till day 5.  BLAH!   I always hesitate to say that I lost a certain amount of weight cause it might not be the same the next day!  Once you lose something it should be gone.  Permanently.  Wouldn't that be nice?!

So yesterday was the day I finally saw 191.0 again on the scale.  Happy dance!  And I was so determined to be good.  There are girl scout cookies in my office and I've eaten a few every day since they arrived.  I think that was Monday.  I ate some yesterday  as well.  But I'm chose to.  I looked at the calories and Trefoils really aren't that bad.  You get a decent amount of cookies for the calories. Anyways, enough about cookies. I've been working longer hours this week to work on this project for our trip to London.  My coworker works 4- 9 hour days and 4 hours on Friday.  So in order to maximize our time together I stayed late every day this week.  I'm not today though, but I will get off 3 hours early on Friday. Knowing my luck my boss will let the whole company leave early and then my comp time wouldn't matter.   He randomly does that and I tend to have bad luck surrounding that. But I don't see that happening tomorrow I hope.

Since I've been working late I've been slacking on working out and riding Eli.  In this case Eli is more important cause he's stuck inside due to the weather.  He needs to move regularly as he's tied up in the past.  I went to the barn last night and there was a group jumping lesson.  No room to lunge Eli.  I knew he'd be full of himself and I was right.  Whew.  Talk about being forward.  I just let him trot, trot, trot.  We didn't get any real work done, but I guess the point was to use the energy.  It was so cold my back started hurting.  And while he was certainly moving I felt like he never really relaxed his back so I just didn't push him into much work.

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So onto the victories. . . .

I saw the 180's this morning!!!!  Holy happy dance.  I got on the scale FOUR times.  Same weight each time!  Whoop whoop!!!  I told my husband once I saw the 180's that we could get pizza. I hate rewarding myself with food.  But we have been eating out once on the weekend usually.  And I was craving pizza, but in general we've made healthier choices when eating out.  Like BBQ for example.  Hunk of meat.  That haven't been covered in butter or fried.  So pizza is a lot of carbs.  I wanted it.  But I felt like I had to *earn* it.  How do you earn pizza?  So I said I needed to see the 180s.  Again I hate the food reward, but I also like goals.  So. . .  I haven't told my hubby yet about the scale.  Ha.  Cause I'm having second thoughts.  I also feel like this was a fluke.  So we'll see. 

Next up - I cut the tags off a pair of jeans this morning. I have no clue when I bought them.  They are from Maurice's.  They are the Taylor jeans in a size 13/14.  Taylor's run big though and they tell you that at the store.  I rarely wear a 14.  I guess at my thinnest I was in a 12, but that didn't last long.  These jeans tend to bag out on me as the day goes on.  I hate that.  And they were a tad lose (though not really in the waist) when I put them on.  So I wonder what they will look/feel like at lunch.  Anyone have a recommendation for jeans that keep their tightness?  

The final victory is that my belt wants to be on the last notch.  I haven't quite put it there cause I tend to like a more loose belt, but it wants to be there.  I might have to look into getting a new belt soon.  Woo hoo!  

I'm going to be honest, I'm still very stressed about the trip because of so many days of eating out.  I guess it's not possible to gain 20 pounds back in 2 weeks right?  I mean I'd have to seriously stuff my face and sit still.  But mentally I'm worried I'm going to return the states and be right back at 211.  I'm trying to keep this scale moving down down down till I leave. I want to have more of a buffer. . . a buffer to what?  I don't know.  That dreaded 200 I guess. I want to remain in onederland!   I like living here and I've been a resident before.  I'd like to not move out this time. :) 

20 pounds!!!

Whoop whoop!  Today I got on the scale after a horrid night's sleep and I clocked in at a 20 pound loss!  I'm super excited.  The weight is coming off slowly.  And it goes up and down.  I ate lunch out twice this week, much to my dismay. The scale went up two days in a row.  I also had a headache from hell after eating some cheese and bread.  I ate bread the day before but no cheese. So maybe I am sensitive to cheese.  I did test sensitive to casein, the protein in cheese.  So this wouldn't be a surprise, but it would suck cause that headache was horrible.  Maybe it was unrelated.  Who knows.   

I made a little tiny bit of progress on the fat %.  That's always slow going.  I really hope the scale wasn't a fluke cause I'm beyond happy.  And I need some happy in my life right now due to the stress of work.  Next goal is 189.  I want to see the 180's!  I think I can get there! :) 

Slippery Slope of Sugar

I gained a pound this morning.  Why?  Cause I ate that stupid cupcake.  And BBQ and a Mountain Dew.  I'm so mad and disappointed in myself.  Not only that but when I baked cookies on Tues I've had one or two every day since.  What the hell is wrong with me?  I've come so far.  I'm one pound heavier than I was on Feb 7th.  This is disappointing. I have to buckle down.  I made the choice last night.  We went to pick up race packets for Saturday.  We had to go to Bissinger's Chocolate to get them.  I didn't buy a single piece of chocolate.  But then I saw that there "The Cup" was on the same block. I've been wanting to go to The Cup for-freaking-ever.  There is one on the IL side of the river, but it's probably a 45 min drive from my house.  I knew there was one on the MO side, but I didn't know where.  Looks like I found it!  And we walked in and left with 2 cupcakes.  I'm kind of frustrated with my husband cause I suggested getting one cupcake to share.  He's not very good about that.  Admittedly he's come a long way and does share food with me so that we don't eat too much or spend too much (like at a ballgame).  But when it comes to sweets he wants his own.  These cupcakes were HUGE.  They are known for being huge.  Mine was soooooo good.  He got maple bacon and I tried it.  Good but not my thing.  I swear I felt my brain short circuiting after I ate this.  

We stopped a very popular BBQ place for dinner after getting our packets.  It was a cold weeknight so there wasn't a line out the door.  I chose to drink a Mt Dew.  My choice.  I'm ok with that.  We ate the cupcakes when we got home.  This morning as I was driving to work I was pondering my choices last night.  The cupcake was the worse choice.  Why?  Because I'm sneaking sweets into my day and that has to stop.  I know the desire to eat a sweet is still here today.  But I don't have the desire for a soda. I  mean if you handed me one I'd want it. But I don't feel the need to seek it out.  I do feel the need to seek out chocolate.   So I've got to buckle down.  I had higher hopes for where I'd be on the scale right now.  Tomorrow is going to be tough being Valentine's Day.  But come Sunday I'm back to being perfect.  End of story.  I have some serious travel coming up and I need to lose more weight BEFORE that travel.  

It's amazing how you can slide right down the slope with just one bite. 

Weekend damage

Friday morning was a happy scale day.  I was back where I was when I lost 5 lbs.  Seriously - how much back and forth can one person do?   This is a constant struggle.

The fat % creeped down a bit so that's good I think!?

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Friday morning my husband and I left for Nashville TN. 

We love going to Nashville.  This is our 3rd trip there.  The last 2 times we went to see Vince Gill (First at the Grand Ole Opry and then at the Opry at the Ryman).   He's my all time favorite and I'm in love with him.  This time we went to see Lennon & Maisy from the ABC TV show Nashville.  We also got to see The Band Perry and Carrie Underwood. 

Those photos are hijacked from the Orpy's Facebook page.  Our seats were not so good as it was sold out show and we bought tickets 2 weekends ago.   

I try to eat well on vacations, but let's be honest here.  I like food.  I like trying new foods.  So Friday morning I ran 5 miles before we left.   Saturday I did not run as we didn't get back to the hotel from the Opry till after midnight (we were at the 9:30 show).   I didn't sleep good as my body didn't like the hotel bed and I was basically in pain.   So Saturday morning I just got up and we ate breakfast at the hotel.  The Drury has amazing breakfast - pancakes, waffles, biscuit and gravy, eggs, toast, bagels, cereal, yogurt, fruit. . . etc.  I don't normally eat a breakfast like that and while I didn't stuff myself I did eat "bad" things.

We went to tour the Belle Meade Plantation.  That place is amazing. It's so rich in Thoroughbred history.  I had no idea!  You can see the mansion behind us. 

Nashville is home to Gigi's cupcakes and I have quite the cupcake addiction. I fully planned to go to Gigi's and I did:

Basically 2.5 of those are mine.  I still have one left! :)  

I had some (many) drinks on Saturday . . .  It was a fun day and everyone needs a fun day every now and again.   This is me with a Flying Monkey :)  (I love Monkeys!)

Sunday morning I ran 3 miles on the treadmill at the hotel before breakfast.   Again it was bigger than normal breakfast for me.  When you have a smoothie every morning for breakfast, it doesn't take much to be bigger than normal.  We drove home on Sunday, but I still got my 10K steps on my fitbit.  I did every day Fri-Sun.  Though on Friday I had them before I finished my run that morning. Lol!   

So today I'm back at work.  I thought about not getting on the scale this morning, but I had to.  Curiosity won out.  What's the damage? 

 FOUR pounds!  I can't say I'm surprised cause I know my body and I know what it reacts to. But seriously.   I worked out 2/3 days.   I was more active than I am on a normal work day. Yesterday may have been the exception since we drove home and I was pretty lazy once home.  But I did work out!  On vacation!  The "old" me would never have done such a thing!  Ha ha.  But since Jan 2012, when we went to Cancun,  I've worked out every single vacation I've went on (not counting Rolex as a vacation - but Rolex involves so much walking it doesn't matter).   I just get kind of frustrated by a large jump in the scale.  My husband gained 2 lbs.  TWO!  I'd be thrilled with just 2.  And really he doesn't know what day last week he was on the scale.  So it could have been even less really.   Geesh.  Men!!!    I don't regret anything I ate or drank this weekend, I just wish the number was a fair representation.   I expect to gain some, but when you subtract activity, there's no way I ate (or drank) 4 lbs of calories!  That's why when people say it's cals in vs cals out, I get so frustrated.  It's not that simple for every body.  Each body is different and mine is clearly not very mathematical.  I wish it were! 

2 weeks of the yo-yo

I feel like I'm getting no where.  3 weeks ago I was at 203.0 

Today . . . 

That's where I was last Friday as well.  So basically I'm not getting anywhere.  I'm less than I was 2 weeks ago, when I posted about a gain. But geesh. . .    I think there are a few factors here.  I'm not strict enough on the weekends.  So I go up a couple pounds and fight like hell to get back to a good Friday weight. 

I'm discouraged, but I also feel like in some way my body is starting to tone.  I was at my barn last night wearing lightweight shorts and a t-shirt.   I had a Dr appt and wore the lightest clothing I own.  A lady asked me if I was losing weight.  I said it was an optical illusion cause I'm not in breeches.  She said no I don't think so, weren't you wearing breeches and a pink top last night?  I said yes.  She said 2 people mentioned to her that I was losing weight.  Hmm.  Why can't they tell me?  That's certainly motivating to say the least.  If my fat % monitor was showing a loss I'd believe that I was looking smaller, but it's not.  However, I think I'll keep on the same path and see where I go.   Maybe with a bit less back to back days of running. . . . 

Last night I had a Dr appt.  I see a naturopath Dr for my thyroid but she has become my primary Dr.  We talked about my afternoon fatigue and possible adrenal support.   Stress really messes up the adrenal glands and they help the thyroid.   So she put me on ashwagandha - a herb - twice a day for adrenal support.   We briefly talked about running and I mentioned that I don't lose weight and that I seem to slowly gain.  She said too much stress on the body and the adrenals are releasing cortisol.   So this herb will help out.   Well. . . I find that I get myself in this rut of having to run run run every day.  At lunch this week I ran M-W.  I forced myself not to run yesterday and quite frankly it was hard.  Of course it was about the best weather day of the week so that didn't help.   But I think running 7-10 days in a row, even when many of the weekday runs are just 2 miles, might not be the best thing.  So I need to shake it up some more.  It's just *so* easy to run at lunch and then not have to deal with it the rest of the day.  So I'm going to ponder this some more and think about what to do.  I still want to do a fall half marathon so maybe now is the time to relax my running to just 3-4 days a week.   However, today is one of those days.  I love my Friday runs.  I run 3 miles and then I pick up a Imo's salad lunch special.  It's my one "bad" lunch that I get during the week at work.  Since I run right before I don't feel so bad.  As the best time to eat would be right after a run. 

I should also mention that I asked my doc about doing a round of HCG in the fall.  It would have to be after my marathon and that's getting really close to the holidays.  So I'm not too sure. But if I can't get below 200 and stay there on my own I might do another round.  I have to get myself in the mental state though and that's tough.  I would like to have birthday cake on my birthday and that would likely not happen due to the timing of this round based on when I want to do a marathon.  But it would be worth it I think? 

On the 4th of July I was off and while I did photograph the scale I didn't post.   We went to a Cardinals game that evening.  (one of the reason my weight goes up - dang ballpark food and drinks)

Here is a selfie and a view from our seats in one photo.  I need to make use of dual camera mode more often.  Though my eyes are practically closed here. 

Following the game there was a fireworks show.  It was just so awesome.  Everyone stayed in their seats and there was anticipation in the air.  Almost like an encore at a concert.   The show was really well done and the fireworks were released all the way around the stadium so every seat had a great view.  These were the only fireworks we saw this year and they were fantastic. Unfortunately I suck at photographing them so many of my photos don't do them justice.  They are tricky to photograph. 

Have a great weekend! :) 

5 pounds!

I lost 5 pounds.  I'm so excited about this because I did it in a rather stress free (for me) way.  On Monday June 2nd I was pissed off at the scale.  It read 208.2.   I decided I'd not get on the scale again till Friday.  Then I could get on again Monday (the weekends are hard for me so I like to monitor the damage) and then again on Friday.  So twice a week.   

On Friday June 6th I weighed in at 205.0.  That's 3.2 lbs!  I wasn't to "sure" of that weight but I know I also put on lb or more the weekend before so it might have fallen off fast. 

On Friday June 13th I weighed in at 204.8.  To say that I was bummed is an understatement.  It was my time of the month that week so it's possible I gained and loss 2 lbs that week, but still . . . . 

So I then gave up the twice a week scale thing unfortunately.  However I was only monitoring this past week and didn't put much stock in the number.  I knew it didn't "count" till Friday.   

And now it's Friday. . . 

Ignore the date.  I'm way *way* too lazy to correct the date on my scale.  :)   

So 5 lbs in 3 weeks.  Not too shabby.  Not as fast as I'd hoped, but I'll take it.  It's motivating me and I need that.  I want to get under 200 lbs as the first goal.  Then we'll talk about the next goal.   

What have I been doing differently?  I've been really strict about what I eat at work.  I eat the same breakfast - a shakeology smoothie.  I have the same lunch - chicken on salad with salsa as the dressing.  I have fruit throughout the day.  I have one serving of Planter's nutrition energy mix with my salad.  I've been trying really hard to not snack in the evenings as much.  I allow myself a snack. .  or 2. But not 5 or 6!   I almost always have a Fiber One oats and chocolate granola bar.   Last Friday at work I ran at lunch and then had a salad from Imo's immediately after.  I allowed myself a few pieces of the cheesy bread that come with the lunch special.  I'm doing that again today because it allows me to break up the monotony of eating the same thing every day.  It's still a salad but it's a treat.  It comes with a small soda and I allow myself to have that.  I've been looking forward to it all week.  I'm trying to find that balance between a really healthy lifestyle and allowing myself to enjoy food/life.  Weekends are a bit more tough as we usually eat out once, but I also run farther on the weekends and am generally more active.  So I guess it's working.  

The biggest thing for me is that I have a "plan" so to speak and my stress level over the scale has decreased.  For me this is huge!

It's getting really really hot and humid here.  We have had a heat index of 100 or really close since Tuesday.  It's tough as hell to get in 2 miles at lunch, but for now I'm sticking with it hoping to acclimate.  I'm also hoping the heat breaks as it was supposed to only be Tuesday that was hot. . . it's Friday now and it's still hot. :(   It's definitely affecting my motivation to run during the day.  But for now I'm hanging tough and I'm just going to "do it!"   

Have a great weekend! 

Creeping

It seems the scale is creeping again.  200.2 this morning.  What is the cause?   I assume delayed reaction to too many carbs.   Sunday my husband and I split a burrito at Qdoba.  Those things are huge to start with.  I don't feel like their food is full of lots of crap.   We got a whole wheat tortilla, rice, beans, chicken . . . etc.  No sour cream much to his dismay.  I had a soda for the first time since early January.  It wasn't as good as I hoped.  Not because my taste buds were overwhelmed, but because it was a shitty coke.   Then Tuesday I went out to lunch at work.  I went to Imo's.  I failed.  I got a chef salad lunch special.  That came with cheese bread and a soda.  The soda cups are small. . . but still.   Sunday was a rest day, mostly because it was a crazy day (someone ran into our pasture fence) and time got away from me.  Monday I ran 3.5 miles at the gym.  Tuesday I felt horrible about lunch so I did a Chalean Extreme workout before dinner.   Yesterday I ran 3.5 miles again.   I ate well yesterday but the scale still went creeping.  Gotta get it under control.

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Yesterday was my first real run outside in months. I saw this on FB yesterday and thought it was very appropriate.

Lately I've been feeling like that first mile lies.  Sometimes I think it will be a great run and it's wrong.  Sometimes I feel like it's going to suck and it gets better.  I'd say it's usually the latter.  Yesterday was so warm.  The park in town was rather flooded.  I ran around town and often had to get off the sidewalks cause they were holding too much water.  I had 3.5 miles on the schedule.  I'm very very sad to say my knee didn't like it and at this point I no longer know what to do.  My massage therapist is sure I have muscles pulling on my knee in all the wrong ways and that is straining my knee.  I admit she finds some painful stuff during her work.  But. . . I'm rolling my IT band, I'm using arnica, I'm using ice. . . this sucks and there's no other way to state it.   I hated every minute of my run yesterday.  That's the other thing that is bugging me.  Above my knee issue I just feel like I'm struggling. My body feels like it weights 300 lbs.  I have to convince myself to keep running.  My knee doesn't hurt at the start and I was at least half way into my run before it started bothering my yesterday and I still wanted to quit in the beginning.  I didn't have this issue when training for my 15K.   I'm not saying the runs were easy.  I'm not saying there weren't times I didn't want to quit.  But I mean right now I'm still at low mile runs and this is insane.  It just seemed easier when training for the 15.  Or maybe it's hindsight that makes it seem that way?  No way.  I don't buy that either.  I spend a lot of time thinking about what might be different and I come up empty.  Eating is the only thing that I can think of that would cause this.  I haven't drastically changed the way I eat so I don't know what it could be.  I'm pushing on. I  have 5 miles on the schedule this weekend.  Either Saturday or Sunday. . . I've adjusted the runs this week so it should be Saturday I suppose and probably will be.  I'm pondering putting on my old shoes just to see (the Kayano's).  I'm also pondering going to the store and getting a different brand of shoe.  Just to see if that helps my legs (not my knee).  I feel like I'm fighting my shoes sometimes.  Again, that's new to me.  I'm trying to stay positive, but it's hard. 

Effort vs results

In all areas of my life it seems if I put in enough effort I get correlating results.  That cannot be said with my battle with the scale.  It's quite depressing.   I worked hard this week I think the scale creeps up more than down.  What is going on?

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I've been in such a funk lately.  Partly because I'm trying to figure out what is going on in life.   Partly because I feel like someone isn't being 100% honest with me.  I'm just flat out crabby. 

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I had a massage yesterday and I'm so sore today.  The place I go to is kind full of various practitioners.   There's a nutritionist as well. I've thought about checking into her services.  Maybe that would help with the scale?  But ultimately I haven't. . . yet.  I can't decide.   She must have had some kind of seminar cause there was a poster board in the waiting room.  I've heard the uproar over Mac and Cheese here in the US.  The artificial dye that is in our version and is *not* in the European version.   Well I snapped this photo:

looks like other products are guilty too.   I find this pathetic.  What is wrong with the FDA?   No wonder we always fail when compared to the health of other countries.  

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So it's that's time of year: Girl Scout cookie time.  And while I'm battling with the scale I'm still ordering some.  They can be frozen.   I just can't find a suitable substitute for my favorite, so I might as well freeze a few boxes.

I love Savannah Smiles!  Lemony yumminess!!!  

I ordered 3 of those and 1 trefoil (shortbread - which is also yummy).  What I did *not* order was any Samoas or Tagalongs.   Why you ask?  Well last year I ordered many boxes of cookies and I don't think I got to eat one of them.  Turns out I discovered they had been eaten straight out of the freezer in the shop.   My husband and I did a 30 day no sweets challenge.  At least I think it was 30 days.  I don't think he did it with me though.  The first weekend he ate birthday cake at his nephew's party.   And then I discovered my precious box of tagalongs was being eaten out of the freezer.  I discovered the partially empty box after the challenge, but I full believe he was eating them during the challenge.  And how would I know? They were in the shop afterall.  So this year, screw that.  I'm ordering these and he better not freaking touch my cookies!

This is a mixed bag blog. I'm going through a lot of mixed emotions right now.

First let's start with vacation. OMG Cancun was gorgeous. I totally needed it. Here was my view from where I was laying out catching some rays poolside:

So on Sunday 1/15 we went to St Louis to stay at the Drury near the airport. My weight that morning was 178.6. A bit on the high end of my maintenance range. We had dinner at the Drury. They have hot eats every night and you really don't need to go out for dinner. I can't even remember what I had. A salad and chicken tenders I think. I had my first soda that night in a LONG time. Wow. I figured I'm going to be drinking alcohol what's the difference? But soda is a slippery slope for me. It's almost like an alcoholic. I have just one and I'm done for. But I maintained control and upon returning home I'm perfectly fine. :) We left Monday for Cancun to return Friday. I did NOT pack my scale. I ate and drank in Cancun. Way more carbs than I normally have. I was addicted to Dirty Monkey drinks and they have bananas in them. I cringe when I think of how many bananas I consumed. lol. Saturday morning when I woke up at home I got on the scale. I was 181.8. That's not too bad! 3.2 lbs. Considering all that I consumed and the carbs I was happy. I should mention here that I worked out at the gym the three mornings I was there. Tues - Thurs. Friday we had to leave for the airport too early to work out and eat breakfast as both places opened at 7 and our shuttle picked us up at 7:55. I was proud of myself. I only did 2 miles on the treadmill but it was something. And it was HOT HOT HOT in that gym. I hated it. Saturday we had plans to go to my parents for my hubby's bday which was the Sat before. I did 3 miles on the treadmill Sat (5K - more on that in a minute) and ate fairly well. But the next day I was up to 182.0. Shoot. I had my yogurt all ready in the fridge before we left for Cancun prepared to do a yogurt day. So Sunday was the day. Monday morning the scale said 179.2. Whew! Much better. 180 is my panic button. Huge panic. I had a riding lesson that day and I went to the gym and did 2 miles. Next day 179.0. Yay. This is Tuesday now. I had a session with my trainer. First since before my trip. We did 4 exercises for each - leg, back, chest and core. I was super sore that night. I rarely get sore the night of anymore. So I was surprised. Wednesday morning I felt like I was ran over my a big truck. I got on the scale . . . .180.4 AH!! Up 1.4 lbs. Deep breath. It's gotta be water being used by my muscles for repair. Drink lots of water. So I did. I also did 3 miles on the treadmill after riding my horse last night. Today . . . 180.6. I'm still really sore but I have a hard time believing it's the muscles now. I have another session with my trainer tonight. Geesh. I'm trying not to panic.

Here's the thing - I'm having a chocolate/candy problem. I did well till about noon yesterday. So today I'm going to try to do better. But even with that my calories yesterday should have been within range. I'm going to try to start tracking again today. I was doing so well at tracking and now I totally don't have the dedication. I start well with breakfast and then it goes to hell. So I'm going to try harder.

So now the 5K. I think I posted about my new found ability to run 3 miles on the treadmill? It's been hard since I returned from Cancun. I'm not sure why since I did hit the treadmill there. I did it Saturday and not again till yesterday. For some reason I crack at the 2 mile mark. But. . . I signed up for a 5K yesterday!!! Yay! It's in April. I can't wait. I want to run (*jog*) the whole thing. But I need to be at like 5 miles on the treadmill first. Cause running outside. . . well I suck. Big time! But no matter what I will do it even if I walk. There are people that just walk them, so as long as I don't finish last I don't care. I don't even know what to expect. This is the first time I've done anything like this. But let the training begin!!!! And let's hope the freaking scale goes DOWN!!!