Choices

It wasn't a fluke! 

I'm in shock. I'm not complaining, but history indicates that this should have shot up today.  I was so excited this morning.  

I made good choices yesterday.  I went to lunch at a pizza place.  It's very very hard for me to not get pizza.  But I was strong.  I looked at my ring and I thought I worked hard to get under 200 lbs. I can have pizza again, but not today.   I ordered a grilled chicken salad.  The lady asked if I wanted a small or large.  She indicated the large was really big.  But when is a lot of lettuce bad for you?  I got the large. OMG.  I wish I'd had taken a photo.  Wow.  It was ginormous.  I can't even guess how much chicken was on there.  I was a bit worried about any butter being used on the chicken.  But I ate every last bite of that salad.  I was stuffed. My biggest concern was that I used every drop of dressing they gave me.  I usually don't do that.  Especially when the dressing comes out in small bowl.  But the salad was just that big.  I had poppyseed dressing.  Every day when I eat at my desk I use salsa as dressing.  When I go out I figure I can splurge and have real dressing.  It was SO good.  

Last night I was on my own for dinner.  I had 2 scrambled eggs with a slice of melted cheese, 3 links of banquet turkey sausage and a glass of chocolate milk.   My favorite dinner!   Now don't think that I don't have "bad" food.  Cause I do!  I made sugar cookies this past weekend.  I gave 24 to my mom to take to work with her.  But I kept some aside for me.  I've had one every night.  It's my treat.  I don't like to "diet" where I restrict food.   I've never been good at that (except with HCG).  When I can't have something I tend to eat *more* other things to satisfy a craving.  Usually I'd have been better off just eating the thing I wanted in the first place.   I also have these skinny cow chocolates filled with caramel.  I had a pack of those.  I'm not going to lie.  6-9 pm is my worse eating time.  I just want to keep eating.  I tend to struggle a tiny bit after lunch at work.  I try to eat lunch as late as possible (I tend to want to eat lunch at 11 am) so that the time between when I'm done with lunch and get to leave work is shorter. :)   Also I just can't keep any kind of food at my desk.  I suck at portion control.  So I have what is in my cooler and that's all I can eat. I'm doing much better with that time of day.  But the evenings hit me hard.  I'm working on that, but so far it hasn't been hurting me too much I guess. 

---

Oh and yesterday was a cross train or 2 mile run.  I chose to run.  I think maybe I should have done the elliptical or stairs for my knee.  I'm still working on that dang knee.  I did ice it last night.  In anycase I have 3 miles tonight.  First I have a chiro appointment.  I swear I have a rib that is slightly out of place.  It was *beyond* painful on Sunday.  I can't even begin to tell you how much pain I was in.  My mom saw me briefly that day.  I guess I looked like hell.  Cause she texted me 3 times on Monday to see how I was doing.  I had a massage on Monday and that seemed to have helped.  Might have even relaxed the rib but things aren't quite right.  So the chiro is first after work.  Then the 3 mile run.  And if it's not to late ( meaning my chiro wasn't running crazy late) then I'll hit the barn for a ride on Eli cause the weather is just suppose to be so nice today (40's).   Have a great day!

Small little *happy* dance

This deserves a happy dance!!!!!

So this is probably temporary.   Yesterday I was like 201.4 (?).   It's also that time of month.   So this is so strange.  However when you get in a huge fight with your husband and don't eat dinner I guess you get rewarded on the scale the next day!  I'm going out to lunch with a friend today so I expect that this number will jump a bit tomorrow.  However I'm super excited to even see this for a moment.

I may have mentioned when I hit Onederland in 2011 I bought myself a ring.  It's a 1 carat 5 stone ring that I got from ID Jewelry in NY.  They are an approved Pricescope vendor.  I ordered it via email and insisted on Pricescope quality stones.  It's fantastic!   I promised myself I couldn't wear it if I was over 200 lbs.  I don't think I've worn it since last April.  I usually wear it as a right hand ring, but sometimes just wear it as a solo wedding band.  I put it on today to remind me that I'm moving forward on this journey and even if the scale is up tomorrow, I'm going in the right direction.  Excuse the crappy cell phone photo.

---

Yesterday started my road to the KY Derby Half Marathon!   I ran 3 miles on the treadmill.  Looking at this plan, I'm committed to the Tues, Thurs, Sun runs.  Though the days may change.  I will get those runs in every week.  I did Hal's 15K training plan and ran Tues, Thurs, Sat most of the time and that worked very well I think.  This half plan has an optional run on Wed.   I can't guarantee I can fit that in every week.  But I will try.  I actually plan on the 2 miles today.  I'm too crabby to go home, so I'll probably ride Eli and then hit the gym for a quick 2 miles.  Plus I gotta burn some calories after going out for lunch.   I was really dreading running yesterday.  I do better when I have a running schedule, but I was rather enjoying the time "off".  I was alternating short 2 miles runs with Chalean Extreme and things were going pretty well.  However, once I got the run done yesterday I felt great and maybe I'm back in the groove.  April will be here before we know it.  

Hello?

Hello!  I've noticed an increase is the views of my blog.  I figure I have very few followers and only one person that I actually "know" follows my blog.  So if you stop by here and read this, please leave me a comment and say hi!  I'd like to meet you and if you have a blog I'd love to check it out. :)

---

As a recap for anyone that is new, or may really not know, I have hypothyroidism.  It sucks.  I don't blame my weight issue (now) on my thyroid, but it sure doesn't help.  I believe I was diagnosed in college.  I remember being so tired.  I didn't think too much of it till one day I was at Wal-Mart and I was *so* tired.  I had a few items in my hands and I set them down and left.  I just drove back to my apartment and . . . I don't remember. lol   That feeling of being soooo sooooo tired is stuck in my brain.  It sucked.  I did gain weight before I was diagnosed.  I went to the Dr I'd been going to since I was too old to see my pediatrician.   He put me on synthroid and I've been dealing with this ever since.   Several years ago however, it seems that synthroid wasn't quite working so well anymore.  I gained weight no matter what I did.   I reached my heaviest weight ever - 250 lbs. I started researching.  I joined Spark People and got in the Thyroid group.   I read the book "Stop the Thyroid Madness".  I was unhappy with how I was feeling.  I went to my Dr armed with all this information and he basically laughed in my face.  He told me he knew better than I did.  I cried.  I was fat. I was depressed.  It was affecting all parts of my life.  He did bloodwork and I suppose he increased my meds. I don't really remember.  I kept on researching and found a Dr in Missouri (probably an hour from my house).  She is a naturopathic Dr (practicing under a regular medical Dr as the state of MO requires).  She is fantastic and pays attention to symptoms and not just numbers.  She also test all aspects of the thyroid (such as T3, reverse T3) instead of simply the TSH.  After trying a few things, I ended up liking Erfa Thyroid from Canada.  I have to pay for it completely myself but I love it.  I feel the best on it and it works for me.   I still struggle to lose weight, but I'm not 250 anymore!   I worry that at some point things will go whacky again, but I see her regularly for bloodwork and I think that if it does start to go crazy she will be able to get me back on track again quickly.

---

As I said I do struggle to lose weight and I had the most success by doing HCG.  *gasp* It's ok.  You can freak out.  I know the diet has a bad reputation but it worked for me.  I've maintained probably just over half the weight loss (having hips surgery and being laid up didn't help with maintenance) for 2 years.  I kind of want to do it again to get over this hurdle.  It really changed the shape of my body. I suspect if I finally lose the 20 lbs I'm battling that I may not fit into my favorite jeans anyways.  Why?  Cause I think the weight will be distributed differently.  HCG really targeted the abnormal fat stores (for me it was my hips).  If anyone has any HCG questions feel free to ask.   I don't think I have the mindset or willpower to go on it any time soon.  I start training for my half marathon next week.  There's no way I can do that being on HCG.  And when the half is done (mid-April) summer will be here and I will be going to ballgames and not want to be restricted.  I'm just hoping that maybe I can buckle down during my 12 weeks of training and get some of this weight off.

---

Speaking of weight, I ate what you saw in that food log I posted yesterday.  For dinner I had 2 scrambled eggs with a piece of melted cheese and 3 links of banquet fully cooked turkey sausage.   I make my eggs in a pan sprayed with Pam.  No butter or oil.   I did have fiber one granola bar and package of fiber one fruit snacks after dinner.  

I filled out the rest of the food log and it won't all fit on my screen, but here's the bottom half. . . ignore the "goals".  I don't know where those came from and haven't figured out how to change them yet.  I did Chalean  Burn 2 last night before dinner.  And I will say the scale rewarded me this morning, so that's a good thing.  Fingers crossed that I can continue this cause I'm sore as heck and hoping to make some progress.  I want to be in Onderland at the very least. 

Nom Nom Nom

Let me start by saying I hate really dislike the term "nom nom nom".   It's popular though.  Today I'm going to talk about food, so I guess it's appropriate.

I decided to go to my fitness pal and track my "normal" work day eating.  Might as well lay it out there and see my calories.

I've never been a proponent of the 1200 cal diet for women.  I think that's really low and I'm not sure who really eats like that.  Maybe people do and I'm just clueless.  When I was on the stabilizing phase of HCG I was eating around 1800 cals a day and maintaining my weight.

Generally speaking, M-F I eat the the same breakfast.  It's a smoothie made of 1 1/2 cups almond milk, 1 banana, 1 scoop Shakeology and ice.  I think this is a appropriate breakfast though my Dr would tell me to eat half a banana because of the sugar.  Who eats half a banana?  Not me.  Once that baby is peeled it's fair game. On the weekend I have the smoothie or eggs (I am a proponent of high protein) and turkey sausage.

M-F lunch is a salad made up of romaine lettuce, 6 oz grilled chicken (again high protein hence the 6 oz), some onions and peppers.  My dressing is salsa.  Why spend calories on Ranch?   Even though I would like to.  IF I go out to eat it's usually to Imo's where I get a chef salad and house dressing (so this would be higher in cals of course) or to a BBQ place where I get a salad that is just lettuce, onion and smoked chicken.   I use BBQ sauce and a little bit of Ranch as the dressing then.  At both places I may eat bread.  I try to avoid carbs, but I think that in general a body needs some carbs even if it is from bread.   Weekends are kind of different.  If I eat the smoothie for breakfast I often have eggs for lunch.  During the week I have a serving of Planter's nutrition energy mix to satisfy my "sweet" craving.

Dinner M-F is usually a meat (around 6 oz) and a vegetable (green beans or creamed corn usually).   We've pretty much cut out carbs for dinner.

So this all sounds pretty healthy right?  Well when I lay out the numbers (minus dinner) it looks like this:

I'm not sure what my thoughts are on this.  Clearly my daily routine is pushing 1200 cals leaving not much room for dinner.  But where do I cut?   What do I remove?   I want to be close to or over 100 grams of protein.   The carbs could be reduced but they are mainly from fruit.  Ahh!  I feel like this is just some kind of evil math.  I don't know what works for my body.  But I'm really frustrated. I don't understand my body.  For example I gained weight this morning.  Dinner last night was 6 oz of grilled chicken with BBQ sauce and butternut squash risotto from Trader Joe's. As I said we normally don't have carbs at dinner but I saw that at TJ's and wanted to try it.  Could that have blown me up?  Probably.   Why is this so hard?  Am I destined to be fat forever?  Probably.  In reality I would say yes.  But why?  What am I doing wrong?

---

So we should talk about working out.  My half marathon training starts next week.  I'm trying to incorporate the lifting workouts from Chalean Extreme to build muscle.  Hopefully making my running more efficient.  I started really working out again on Sat Jan 11th.  Taking in account that I'm only lightly running till the training starts.  Here's what I did:

                            Jan 11: Chalean Burn 1
                            Jan 12: 2 mile run
                            Jan 13: Chalean Burn 2
                            Jan 14: 2 mile run on treadmill
                            Jan 15: Chalean Burn 3
                            Jan 16: Rest (I had a massage!)
                            Jan 17: 2 mile run on treadmill and 2.5 miles on bike
                            Jan 18: Chalean Burn 1
                            Jan 19: 2 mile run
                            Jan 20: 2 mile run and Chalean Burn 3 (should have been burn 2 but oh well!)
                            Jan 21: Chalean Burn Intervals (this is a 45 min workout alternating cardio and high reps                                           of light weight - it's pretty challenging)

So. . . I think that's pretty damn good.  I mean this is dedication right?  And my weight?  I keep going up and down the same pound.  And I'm pretty damn sick of it!  

---

I don't want to do HCG again, but I'm seriously pondering it.  It seems to be the only thing that has ever really worked for me.   It's hard as hell but the rewards might be worth it.  I really can't decide.  But I'm tired of living like this.  I really think about what I can eat all the time.  I hate it.   And when I do eat something I shouldn't, I immediately think about what workout I can do. I'm a "cardio punisher".   By that I mean I use cardio as payback for eating something I shouldn't (like cookies yesterday).   Do I need to go full paleo?   Do I need to try Atkins?   What exactly?   Cause I'm tired of working this hard to just maintain my weight.  And I'm damn tired of hovering just above 200 lbs.  I promised myself that I wouldn't get above 200 lbs again.   And yet here I am. . . and I want to wear that ring I bought myself for reaching Onederland.  But I promised myself I could only wear it if I was in Onderland.  So it sits in my jewelry box.  :(  And I continue to stress about this every day. 

Binge eating

I read Runs For Cookies and she talks about binge eating quite a bit.  She recently read a book called "Brain Over Binge".  I'm pondering getting that book.  I totally binged last night.  I've never really thought of my eating habits as binging.  But what is random eating when you aren't hungry?   So last night my husband went hunting.  I had been feeling down and out about the scale.  That morning I ran 2 miles and did a Chalean Extreme lifting workout.   I didn't really eat breakfast and I had my normal breakfast smoothie for lunch.  I had to take my cat to the cardiologist for a check up.  I got home at 6.  I made 2 hole in one eggs for dinner.  I wanted the protein from eggs.  I do believe my body does better with a high protein diet.  I threw away the center bread piece from one of the pieces of bread, to reduce the carbs.  I had 3 links of Oscar Meyer Turkey Sausage.   Ok, this is all ok.   But then I ate a piece of left over bday cake.  Then I ate two cups (not measuring cups, but drinking cups) of Quisp Cereal.  I ate some fruit snacks.  I don't even remember what else.  I wasn't hungry.  I was craving things.  And I just ate.  I would say this is binging.  I don't do this often, but you know what?  Maybe I need to read about this concept.   It's probably enough to derail my diet even though I don't do it very often.  I feel like my body is stuck though.  Often I think I'd do better just dieting and not working out.

---

For some reason I find decorating cookies to be relaxing.  And it's kind of my new hobby.  I want to get better at it.  I don't really find them terribly tempting to eat cause I want to give them away.  Today I brought these to work

I did eat one of the medium size cookies.   But I haven't had any more.  Hopefully they get scarfed up at work today.  But I made Oatmeal Raising & Cookies-n-cream cookies as well.  Cookie overload at work!

I'm already planning my next cookie challenge.  It's a valentine's cookie and I'm trying to find the cutters at a reasonable price. 

Effort vs results

In all areas of my life it seems if I put in enough effort I get correlating results.  That cannot be said with my battle with the scale.  It's quite depressing.   I worked hard this week I think the scale creeps up more than down.  What is going on?

---

I've been in such a funk lately.  Partly because I'm trying to figure out what is going on in life.   Partly because I feel like someone isn't being 100% honest with me.  I'm just flat out crabby. 

---

I had a massage yesterday and I'm so sore today.  The place I go to is kind full of various practitioners.   There's a nutritionist as well. I've thought about checking into her services.  Maybe that would help with the scale?  But ultimately I haven't. . . yet.  I can't decide.   She must have had some kind of seminar cause there was a poster board in the waiting room.  I've heard the uproar over Mac and Cheese here in the US.  The artificial dye that is in our version and is *not* in the European version.   Well I snapped this photo:

looks like other products are guilty too.   I find this pathetic.  What is wrong with the FDA?   No wonder we always fail when compared to the health of other countries.  

---

So it's that's time of year: Girl Scout cookie time.  And while I'm battling with the scale I'm still ordering some.  They can be frozen.   I just can't find a suitable substitute for my favorite, so I might as well freeze a few boxes.

I love Savannah Smiles!  Lemony yumminess!!!  

I ordered 3 of those and 1 trefoil (shortbread - which is also yummy).  What I did *not* order was any Samoas or Tagalongs.   Why you ask?  Well last year I ordered many boxes of cookies and I don't think I got to eat one of them.  Turns out I discovered they had been eaten straight out of the freezer in the shop.   My husband and I did a 30 day no sweets challenge.  At least I think it was 30 days.  I don't think he did it with me though.  The first weekend he ate birthday cake at his nephew's party.   And then I discovered my precious box of tagalongs was being eaten out of the freezer.  I discovered the partially empty box after the challenge, but I full believe he was eating them during the challenge.  And how would I know? They were in the shop afterall.  So this year, screw that.  I'm ordering these and he better not freaking touch my cookies!

Test

It seems I lost all my followers by changing my blog address.  Or at least any future posts won't show up in their reading list.  

My Photo

I change my blog address so to continue following me, unfortunately you will have to add my new address to your reading list:
http://ilikewarmhugs.blogspot.com/
Sorry for the inconvenience. :(

---

I took this photo earlier this month in the crazy blowing wind and snow:

I love it.  And I want to print it to hang in my house.  I have taken so many photos for other people that I'm jealous of them having photos to hang in their house.  I can't decide to print this and frame it or get a canvas.
Tuesday night we were at dinner with Roger's family for his birthday.  It's kind of odd because we don't get together for his sister's bday.  At least not that I can seem to remember.  Yet we almost always go out to dinner for his birthday. I don't get it.  Not at all.  And this year he was a cranky person leading up to his birthday and didn't want to do anything.   I don't know. . . . anyways, we were not getting along as we got to dinner and it was probably obvious to his family.  However, near the end of dinner we were talking about the snow and I mentioned that I took photos.  I confess that I'm really in love with this photo and I'm pretty proud of how it looks.    I showed it to his mom (she lives on this property with us) and she was like oh wow!  Then she told Roger's sister that she should paint that.  WHAT?   I was like "I'm going to print this!"  In my world photography is a form of art and it's no less so than painting.  But apparently a photo isn't quite as good as a painting. Whatever.  Once again my feelings get hurt.  I don't love being an in-law.

Limbo Land

Either you have one or more of these: 

or. . . .

you don't. 

I don't.  I'm 35.  Not a mom.  That puts me in . . . well I call it Limbo Land.   I don't fit in with people my age with kids.  It was very clear to me as I was sitting at a Christmas gathering with my sister in law and my cousin's wife.  I didn't fit in.  Nope.  Not at all.  Even on topics that I knew about, I was constantly getting talked over top of until I got up and walked away.   

I always say I don't have many friends.   And that's partly true because my friends have kids and they do things with their friends. . . with kids.   So here I am.  My husband's best friend is a confirmed bachelor.  He's older than me but younger than my husband.   If it weren't for him I'm not sure who my husband would do things with.  Although it does cause issues cause the bachelor view on the world is still very different, in my opinion, than a married man.  Though my husband seems to adopt that bachelor viewpoint when hanging with him. 

I often wonder what things would be like if we did have kids.  Would my husband hang out with his friend in the shop drinking beer till well after I've gone to sleep?  Would I suddenly be invited to the new year's eve party at my cousin's house?   (It seemed to be geared towards kids)   Would I  meet other parents at sports events or dance class?    I look into the future and wonder where life might lead should we really not have kids?   Cause we don't quite fit in with many people. Those without kids are generally too young to really connect with.   

However, I seem to have taken permanent residence in Limbo Land.  I wish the population was a bit higher.  

SNOW!!!

This was a crazy weekend!  OMG.

First we had another Christmas on Saturday.  So Friday night we made more sugar cookies!  YAY. I had got some really tiny cutters from Target after Christmas and I just couldn't wait a whole year to use them.  I really really love decorating cookies.  I think my goal this year is to learn how to get better at it.  It's so relaxing and therapeutic for me.  This time I felt like Roger rushed a bit more than the last time, so his didn't look quite as good.

So Christmas on Saturday. . . my Dad's family is a HOT mess.  They are never on time.  But apparently they are also not very clear on plans.  We were told Christmas at 3:00.  I figured we would eat by 4.  Around 4:30 I found out that eating was a 6:00pm.  And some people knew that and other did not.  I would *never* have been there at 3:10 if I had known.  My poor dad. . . . he had been out delivering gas that day and rushed. . . he was "late" (for the 3:00 time) but was not thrilled to sit there wasting time when he could have not rushed and also finished some chores at home (feeding animals) before coming to Christmas.  Ugh.  I literally grazed on crap food for 3 hours!!!   Not good.  Not good at all.

---

The weathermen kept saying it was going to snow Saturday night through Sunday.  I'm not sure I really believed the predictions (10-ish inches).   When it wasn't snowing Sat night I thought maybe we wouldn't get it at all.  Umm . . . no we got it.  Whew.  It snowed ALL day Sunday.  And it was windy as could be.  Snow was blowing sideways.  Since we don't live in town it was hard to get a feel for how much snow we got cause the wind caused 4 ft drifts and left some places bare.   I enjoyed spending the day inside watching it snow.    I did go outside to take photos and I'm not sure why.  I was miserable.  I couldn't see the LCD of my camera very well.  I just trusted I knew what I was doing.  I got some good pics though.  And here you will see my poor little snowman all buried in snow. I  imagine he loves the snow but probably hoped it didn't cover his eyes!

My office was closed yesterday and again I enjoyed the day at home.  I was lucky my dentist remained open and I got my tooth fixed without taking time off work.  We watched The Host last night.  I loved that book and I enjoyed the movie.  I thought it was well done.

---

I know why I put my heart rate monitor for my Garmin on upside down all the time!  I didn't run this weekend.  However, on my last run I noticed about 30 secs into the run that it was upside down and was able to correct it.

It's the exact opposite orientation from my Polar HR monitor.  I always put my Polar on with the rounded side up.  I didn't matter with the Polar though. It would work no matter what.  With the Garmin, the little runner dude has to be right side up in order for the running dynamics to work.  The heart rate will still be recorded, but not the running dynamics.   And it appears I still want to put it on with the rounded side up - which makes the runner dude upside down!  My husband said "I can paint a mark on it so that you will know which way is up".  I said "honey there is a mark on it, there's a little runner dude!  But apparently I still can't follow directions!"

I signed up!

Well I did it.  I signed up for the KY Derby half marathon.  OMG.  My friend messaged me yesterday asking when we were going to sign up.  I wasn't 100% sure she was totally "in" for doing it.  I mean it's a big thing to fly from CO to StL and road trip to KY just to run.   lol.    So I was kind of dragging my feet.  Since she messaged me *and* I had just got a coupon code for $5 off in email that morning I decided to take the plunge and sign up!

I'm nervous.  Not going to lie.  I'm worried about my knee, but I'm trying to give it a rest.  Today I may hit the gym and do a machine that is not the treadmill.   Tomorrow is going to be a freaky day in terms of temps and we may get close to 40 degrees.  So I'd like to go for a run.   I really don't want to *stop* running totally.  I worry about losing the fitness and the desire.   Temps are really cold today, but after Sat they are supposed to drop even more.   It may snow Sat night (they say "major" when talking about the storm!).   But Monday is going to be the lowest temp we've seen since 1999.  I'm unclear how cold, I hear a high of -5, but I also hear a high of +5.  Ha ha.   We'll see.   As much as I may "like" running I will not run in temps that cold.  Forget that. The problem with the gym is that it's so freaking crowded because of the new year.  In a few weeks it'll thin out as everyone falls off the healthy wagon.

---

I haven't mentioned Eli in a while.  He's been on stall rest since the week of Thanksgiving.  He strained a suspensory.  But in terms of suspensory it seems rather mild.  My vet has been letting me lunge him lightly for a while.  I added in canter (my vet is in Hawaii so I've been winging it) and last night I lunged him with side reins.   He seems sound.  I hate this thought cause the suspensory is so tricky.  I question things I "think" I see that I wouldn't question normally.  I'm going to call the vet today and see if he's back.  I'd like to try to hop on Eli on Sat since it's suppose to be kind of warm.   I think I can really tell if I can feel him.   But we have another Christmas on Sat.  Ugh.   This is the LAST one.  I'm so tired of it honestly.   Mostly of eating ham.   And just plain eating. . . .

---

I have a goal to eat better this year.  But my short term goal is to lose 10 lbs by Valentine's day.  I was going to start this yesterday.  And I did well till I got home.  Wow.  I can shove some food down my face in the evenings!  I am meeting a friend for lunch today.  I may really hit it on Monday.  I knew it would be a challenge with another xmas coming up.  But I'm still doing better than I was and any move in the right direction is positive.   I haven't been working out /running much so that's a problem too.  Once I get that going again things should start to look up.  It will still be very hard to actually lose 10 lbs by Feb 14th though.  I think my body loves my current weight cause I've maintained it +/- 5 lbs for quite some time now.  

To sign up?

Well New Year's was a crappy as I thought it would be.  I gotta confess, if you haven't figured it out already, that my marriage is pretty rough.  On NYE I almost ended up leaving at staying at my parents.   Given the face that my husband's first wife left him on new year's eve, I was trying not to repeat that.  Honestly I just don't understand men.  I really wanted to go to the movies that night.  Yet it didn't happen cause he couldn't get his ass in from the shop.  His nephew was there, but really - they had been to lunch and had been talking in the shop for 2.5 hours.  IMO it was my turn.  But apparently I was the only one that thought that way.  Whatever.  I said I hated this holiday and that continues to be true.  We ended up watching Pitch Perfect and went to sleep at 9-ish I guess.  I can't even remember.   I got one text at midnight and Roger got 2 or 3.  I can't remember.  I know someone sent him a mass text and so one of them was a reply to that from someone that he doesn't know.  Why do people need to "reply all" on phones?  I have *never* done that.  I was cranky to wake up just after midnight.  I was sleeping rather well.

---

Yesterday we went to the outlet mall.   I wanted to go to the Disney store to get a Frozen figurine set for myself my nephew. Ok we will share it.  They didn't have it, but I could order it from them and get free shipping.  So I did.  In the meantime I got the last stuff Olaf they had.  They said they have a hard time keeping him in stock.

I mean how cute is he???   Yes I spent $40 on a stuffed animal.  But I didn't even care at this point.   I'll admit that I have a shopping problem but it makes me happy when not much else does right now.  And this morning when I woke up and saw him sitting there, I smiled.   How can you not? 

We also got a carpet cleaner.  A Hoover SteamVac something or other.   It was at this direct tools store I think.   We only went in cause it was a "man" store and I felt like Roger should get to look at something :)   Anyways it was $129.99 and 35% off.  We get our carpets cleaned twice a year professionally.  The cats just make that many stains.  I love it when they are clean.  That costs somewhere around $100 I think.  So we figured we would try this.  If it fails we will sell it.  But hopefully it works and we can keep up with the carpet ourselves.  Or at least have it professionally done only once a year.  

Oh and I got the Under Armour slash tights.  They are cold weather tights.  I saw them last time I was there (Nov) and didn't get any.  I should have cause they only had this green-ish color left in my size.  Well they only had yellow left in general.  This color looks yellow, but we noticed it's slightly different.  Normally I wear a large in UA, but I got XL in these.  They just looked better and showed the lumps and bumps a bit less.  If that's possible.   I don't have my own photo, but they look like this.  Honestly in person they look more yellow though.  Eh - not the best color compared to the choices they had 2 months ago, but the price was acceptable and I wanted just one more pair of cold weather tights. 

After we left the outlet we went to lunch.  What an ordeal.  I was hungry!  We saw this restaurant called Mimi's Cafe.  It was cute.  It was not small (like cafe would imply).  I fell for the roof of the building as lame as it sounds.   There was sign in the lobby that said sirloin pot pie.  Ok great.  I wanted some kind of nice hot comfort food.  The wait was short but as we were waiting we decided it seemed like a french cafe.   We got seated.  After a brief look at the menu I said I didn't want to eat there.  I didn't want some fru-fru croissant that was overpriced.  I'd rather just eat at Bread Co.  So before the waitress could come get our drink order, we left.  Just walked out.   We went down the road to Brick House Tavern & Tap.  Cool place.  Good food, but the waitress was SLOW.   I got a turkey club actually cause it sounded so good.  It was topped with deviled eggs if you can believe that.   But really the bill was $35 and we tipped $2.  I was so mad at how long everything took.  Even getting our check. . . then getting our receipt.  Ugh.   

We did stop at Dillard's on the way home to see what this big New Year's sale was about.  OH MY GOODNESS!  That place was trashed.  For such an "uppy" store the place looked like a tornado went through.  I rarely shop there cause it's just too expensive.  It looked horrible.  I wanted to find some bed sheets or a new comforter.  But we came up empty handed. 

---

I want to run a half marathon.  It's my next running goal.  In 2011 my friend came to St Louis, from New York, to run the Rock and Roll half.  I almost signed up cause I was going to have hip surgery in a few months and wondered if this was my last chance to run.  You never know how you will recover.  We were walking around the expo and saw a booth for the KY Derby Half Marathon.  We both love (and own) horses.  Oooh how fun to run through Churchill Downs!!!!   But it's always been the same weekend that I am in Lexington KY for Rolex.  Except this year.   This year it's the weekend prior.  It's Easter weekend.  The race is on Sat the 19th.  My friend now lives in CO and said she'd fly to StL and we could drive to Louisville and do the race.  Ironically the 20th is her bday.  Expensive gift to herself huh?!  But we kind of need to sign up. And I'm kind of worried about my knee.  Today I got a $5 coupon code.  Is that a sign? Do I just take the plunge and sign up?   Figure out my knee as I go?  I was going to sign up for a half on April 6th and training wasn't scheduled to start till mid-Jan.  With the race a couple weeks later I wouldn't have to start for a couple more weeks.  Maybe even beginning of February.   So I can rest.  I was going to run yesterday but ran out of time.  Now we have some really cold weather settling in.  Monday will be below 0.  That doesn't happen too often here.   So I don't know. . . do I run a few times before deciding?  Or just rest and suck it up and sign up?  I can't decide!  But my friend would need to book plane tickets soon and we'd need to book a hotel.  I suck at decisions!