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Monday, May 7, 2012

Panic Button!!!!!

Oh my!  I don't know where to begin.  I missed 2 Wednesday blogs so let's start there. 


4/25/12 - I left for a trip this day and my weight was 180.8  - down 0.8 from the previous Wed.
5/2/2012 - 182.8 (UGH!)


So that brings me to today.  I hit my panic weight this morning.  That magical number has been 185 for me.  The max weight I'd hit this year was 183.6 and I was trying to be ok with that.  I knew with running I could gain weight.  I read about it all over the internet.   I tried to swallow my disappointment and push through.  Then Sunday I was at 184.8.  WHY?  I ran Saturday.  I ate well.   Or so I thought.   I ignored it.  Yesterday morning I ran.  I did 5 miles. But I implemented the run/walk method.  It was so crazy humid here and I wasn't acclimating well.  The only way I could make 5 was to walk at some point.  So I ran 0.9 miles and walked 0.1.  I watched another blogger do this and it was working well for her.  So off I went with my RunKeeper app set to alert me of the intervals.  I actually ran the last 0.1 cause I was close to home and made myself. :)  LOL.  I have no idea if this affected my overall pace.  The other blogger hasn't noticed it affect hers. My pace was a min slower than normal, but I was running so slow!  I mean I really am struggling with this weather.  So I couldn't judge what the walking did for me.  But I spent over an hour outside in the heat and humidity and I burned at least 800 cals!  (I don't remember what my watch told me.  I was too happy to be home in the AC to care!).


So I really watched what I ate yesterday.  Sure I had some chocolate.  But I burned some serious cals.  And I didn't have that much.  But wow oh wow.  The scale was sure unhappy with me this morning. 


185.6!!!!!!!!!  TIME TO PANIC!


I have no idea why this is.  I don't know what to do.  I really really really do NOT want to do another round of my diet.  But I will if I have to I guess.  I need to get a grip on this.  Do I need to stop running?  I know someone that lost more weight when they didn't work out.  But then you are just fat-skinny.  I like muscle!   I'm really struggling with this today.  It's like someone died.  I'm just a complete emotional mess!   And yes I want to drown my sorrows in fatty foods and chocolate.  I need to get a grip.  I need you all to smack some sense in me.  I have to buckle down.  I need to lose weight on my own.  Period.  Without doing another round of my diet.  I need to figure this out with eating right and exercising.   I need to stop making excuses.   I need to do this!  I can do this!   




That's this month's spreadsheet.  Again the avg is not cumulative - it starts over every month.  I guess I need to work on figuring out how I can change that.  I have nothing else to say.  I'm just staring at the numbers.  I need to figure something out.   And FAST!

2 comments:

  1. Hey Hoof. First of all . . . STOP. I know how you beat yourself up. It's not that bad.

    We are all here for ya, girlie. This too can change.

    Have you tried eating clean for a while? You can also do a P3 correction day as well. I know you're no longer on protocol and are basically in the lifetime phase, but it may work. You know how to knock these pounds off.

    However, I must say I am not a runner. Therefore, someone else may be able to give you advice on how that works. I just know, Dannee is not that type of expert.

    But . . . you can do this. Just find your center, dear friend. There's no need to panic. Just calm down and relax. Know that these pounds will shed.

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  2. You can do it!~ we all have crazy gains, just keep up the great work have faith in yourself and keep moving forward.

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